As we find our rhythm for 2022, endure big life changes, and prepare for the best year of our life, I want us collectively to sit in honesty. This may seem like an easy task, cause we “grown”, but understand, people only lie out of fear. And nothing is scarier than the hard truth you owe yourself.

I was so confused on so many repeating patterns in my life, wondering why I keep putting myself in these situations, why do I deserve this -or my favorite- why didn’t I see this coming. But the hard truth was honesty.

I wasn’t truly healing from one situation to the next. I was going through the stages of grief, and calling them healing and learning, when they are in fact, just emotions. Too often do we mistake feeling emotions with the actual work required to heal.

The root of healing comes when someone can ask you about a situation and you can be honest about the ugly parts. When you don’t immediately blame others involved, and actively work on the parts of yourself that require it. Just like working out, you must exercise that change.

I am sure we have all been in situations where we wish we kept our composure, kept our emotions in check, or even beat ourselves up for what we should have said or did. This comes from thinking since we are past emotions, we have healed, and are ready for what’s next. Only to be put in the situation yet again.

Now there are exceptions to what you can take ownership to, yet you can take accountability for how it has affected your life, attitude, and relationships.

For example, I experienced homelessness as a teenager and being discarded by the very people who were supposed to love and protect me. There is no way I could ever not blame adults for how they treated me as a child, or ever take any responsibility for it. Yet, I can understand why I get so emotional when people say they love me yet make me feel discarded. I can recognize that is trigger language for me, where it stems from, and be sure I don’t lash out when faced with those type of emotions. I can also be verbal about my real experiences, without trauma dumping.

Be honest about what happened, own it, admit it. Then find your rhythm, find your truth, and most of be brave enough to be honest.

-Sit with Self

Honesty is the first step in healthy relationships, with self and others. Head over to www.spiritualunicornbae.com and sign up for my class on healthy relationships.

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